Being Present: What a Sabbatical Taught Me About Leadership and Attention
A reflection on slowing down, unlearning urgency, and rediscovering focus.
“…but no one had yet compiled a playlist for those sluggish Sunday afternoons in her one‑bedroom flat, listlessly foraging on social media, incontinently liking posts, present but anonymous as someone clapping in a stadium crowd.” — David Nicholls, You Are Here
Have you ever scrolled endlessly, liking posts you’ll forget five minutes later? That image — present but anonymous, like someone clapping in a stadium crowd — gave me pause for thought because it described something I recognised: being visible, busy, even connected… but not truly present.
As a Head of School, I always felt a responsibility to show up — concerts, assemblies, parents’ evenings, community events. I was visible, interacting, and seemingly everywhere. But often, my mind wasn’t where my feet were. It was already racing ahead to the next deadline, meeting, or report. I was performing presence — smiling, nodding, applauding — yet internally juggling tomorrow’s list. That realisation struck me: I had mistaken visibility for connection. Showing up isn’t the same as being present.
It took a sabbatical for me to unlearn that habit of urgency. At first, stepping away was uncomfortable. I kept mentally rushing, even when there was nowhere to go. Only after months of slowing down did I start to notice stillness again — and how much I’d missed it. We often associate momentum with purpose, but sometimes constant motion is just noise — a way to feel indispensable while avoiding quiet. When the urgency finally eases, clarity returns. I am learning that attention is a discipline, not a default.
Re‑learning presence has been less about formal mindfulness and more about simple, deliberate attention — small, conscious choices that bring me back to the moment:
- Walking without headphones and noticing the rhythm of footsteps.
- Beginning the day with intention before opening my inbox.
- Listening without planning my reply, giving space for others to finish their thoughts.
- Pausing before hitting “send,” breathing, then responding with awareness.
And occasionally, it’s just sitting with a coffee — no phone, no noise — letting quiet do its quiet work. The longer I stay with one thing — really stay — the more vivid life becomes. It’s humbling to realise how often we hurry past the richest parts of our days.
Presence in leadership isn’t inactivity — it’s focus with empathy. The most effective leaders I’ve known aren’t the busiest, but the most attuned. I still remember the difference when I stopped multitasking in staff conversations. People noticed. They felt heard. And they trusted more. Presence doesn’t slow things down; it creates space where others can think, speak, and grow. When we lead from presence, conversations deepen, trust strengthens, and culture shifts from transaction to connection.
Perhaps what we all need is our own “Sunday playlist” — not of songs, but of moments that remind us to pause: a walk, a conversation, a quiet coffee, a simple breath. They’re not luxuries; they’re essential acts of restoration. Because in the end, maybe the most powerful form of leadership — and of living — is simply being fully where you are.
What keeps you grounded in the present when life feels too fast?